Well, i just read the last thing you wrote again. Meg, i love you with all my heart. Though it's understandable you being unsure of whether or not to give this another chance. It hurts that much more when you get so upset with me when it's obvious i am trying. I explained my educational goals and their purpose, so maybe that will ease your mind a bit.
But that on top of the conversation we had last night, that really fucked me up. Maybe i deserve it, but please please please, don't let me do all this if you won't be the perverbial light at the end of the tunnel.
Now i'm on my knees Megan, I'm crying, begging you, let me do things right for us. You already told me you basically won't let yourself love me anymore. If you're strong enough to hide that from yourself, be strong enough to let me try one last time.
I want to start by saying im sorry.. When I think about you I feel confused. Im realy bitter. I had gotten over you suprisingly well. Then you showed up and stirred it all up again. I have faith in you I always have, but at the end of the day your still that guy that made me lay myselfe onto the ground and weap. I have such mixed emotions about this new faith that im trying to have for you. I think the nastyist emotion that people posses is our ability to be heartless and mean. Im sorry for showing my weakness by being mean to you, the one person that ive truly adored. I need time. Im sorry....M
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