For what it's worth, I do miss u M. Not entirely, but those rare times you would let me close. Where I could hold your hand and just be with you... Our naps. Those moments that there were so few of. The moments I clung to.
But right now, it's not you my heart is aching for. While there wasnt anything tangible between her and I, I did meet a woman who sparked life back into my heart. Just as full of shit as you ever were. Yet and still, just being around her. Talking to her. Making and seeing her eyes light up when she smiled and laughed her dorky laugh...she made me want to be better.
But you know how I am. All or nothing. Exactly why I'm shedding tears over something I could never have: a woman whom truly awakens my soul. It's okay though, because I'm just going to order a shit ton of seroquel online and end my misery. At least this time I know better than to message anyone any goodbyes while I'm in the process. So let this be my goodbye to you my love. You truly were my one and only. And 100% right about me not seeing you in my future. But nor have I seen myself with anyone else, though not for lack of trying.
Still, so much of me belongs to you. No matter how far away we've pushed eachother. And with that i will love you til my dying breath. That breath which I hope to soon take.
Au revoir mi amor
